A man asked for a meal in a restaurant. The waiter brought the food and put it on the table. After a moment, the
man called the waiter and said:
“Waiter! Waiter! There’s a fly in my soup!”
“Please don’t speak so loudly, sir,” said the waiter, “or everyone will want one.”
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There are 5 birds in a tree. A hunter shoots 2 of them dead. How many birds are left?
2 birds. The other 3 fly away!
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An English teacher wrote these words on the whiteboard: “woman without her man is nothing”. The teacher then asked the students to punctuate the words correctly.
The men wrote: “Woman, without her man, is nothing.”
The women wrote: “Woman! Without her, man is nothing.”
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What’s the definition of a pessimist? A pessimist is a well-informed optimist.
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A man was injected with a deadly poison, but, it did not kill him. Why?
He was already dead!
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Charles was getting annoyed and shouted upstairs to his wife,” Hurry up or we’ll be late.”
“Oh, be quiet,” replied his wife. “Haven’t I been telling you for the last hour that I’ll be ready in a minute?”
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What kind of ears does an engine have? Engineers
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What’s green and look’s like a bucket?
A green bucket!
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A mother’s advice to her daughter about choosing the right man:
1. You need a man who has a good job and is a good provider.
2. You need a man who worships you and treats you like a princess.
3. You need a man who can make you laugh.
4. You need to make absolutely sure that these four men never meet!
Just Dream 